Family Transformations: From Traditional to Chosen

In our minds, we often picture the typical family as a married couple with a few kids. However, this "nuclear family" is now becoming less and less common in the United States. We're in a time of change, holding on to an old idea of family that was popular between 1950 and 1965. So, why did this traditional family structure fade, and what do families look like today?

Throughout history, families were close-knit groups that worked as a unit to support the family's livelihood, especially on farms. In 1875, most American workers were farmers, and the rest worked in small family-run businesses. In many cases, extended families, including aunts, uncles, and cousins, were a big part of life. They provided a safety net if something went wrong, a large group who could help with childcare, look after elderly and frail family members, and provide for each other in times of hardship or disability.

During the Victorian era, a period in the 1800s, extended families were more common in the US and Britain than ever before. This was a time of big changes, and people felt not just economic pressure, but also moral pressure. The extended family served as a moral compass, teaching children right from wrong and preserving traditional family values. But as cities grew, young people left home to chase their dreams. This led to the rise of the nuclear family. By 1960, almost 78 percent of children were raised in nuclear families and there was heavy pressure to conform to this way of living.

At that time, everything worked together to support the nuclear family. Wages were high, which allowed one person to support the household and freed up the other to take care of family and domestic responsibilities. There were strong unions, high church attendance, and a great deal of trust in society. However, from 1965, this stability began to fade. The conditions that had created the idealised families of the 1950s began to change, leading to the more strained families of the following decades.

Over the past 50 years, the number of people living alone in America has doubled. One salary is often no longer enough to support a family, people are getting married later and divorcing more often, while the number of children being born is dropping. The changes have hit less well-off households the hardest. Recent data shows that wealthier people have the means to cope without extended family more easily, enjoying the benefits of a detached nuclear family structure without the corresponding drawbacks. Being able to bring in outside help, they have been able to enjoy greater freedom, but for those who are less affluent, it has been much more challenging. They now have to do all the work that was once shared among extended family members. Balancing career responsibilities with the raising of children and care for elderly parents has become a delicate juggling act for many adults. What’s more, women continue to shoulder a lot more of the housework and childcare responsibilities despite often having equally demanding work commitments.

One of the most interesting trends in recent decades is the rise of chosen families. This started in the 1980s in San Francisco within the gay and lesbian community. People who had lost touch with their biological families came together to form new bonds. Chosen families helped them navigate the ups and downs of modern life in much the same way that traditional families had always done. Family became no longer just about blood ties, but also about the deep connections people chose to make.

The family situation varies greatly by country and region. Globally 38 percent of people still live in extended family units. In some places, like Gambia, households average 13.7 members, while in Mexico, kinship groups can include up to 70 people. While extended families have some downsides, such as less privacy and more responsibilities, having many people in your life who share strong familial bonds has distinct advantages too. For one, you have access to a support network of people in times of difficulty, and much greater levels of companionship, something which is especially important as you age.

The evolution of family structures reflects shifts in societal values and lifestyles. From the close-knit agrarian families of the past to the emergence of nuclear families during the mid-20th century, each era brought its own set of challenges and opportunities. Today's world continues to change and with it, the kinds of family structures we can find around us.